Do you ever wake up feeling anxious about the day ahead but can’t put your finger on why? Or do you feel like you’re forever busting a gut to get to where you want to be – whether that’s in an office, in a relationship or whilst working for yourself? Then maybe you’re also stuck in a rut like me.
For many of you, you probably won’t even recognise this ‘rut’. Perhaps you possess the tenacity and drive to just keep on going for one reason or another and are able to ignore the feelings of mundanity, anxiety or lack of control. Perhaps these feelings don’t even register in your head, and if you are one of those people, I salute you.
I, however, am a worrier.
I wake up worrying, I go to sleep worrying and I almost definitely worry in my dreams. I am an over-thinker and I like to psycho-analyse the tiniest and most insignificant of shit. And for the most part, it really is just that; shit. Whilst a large proportion of this worry boils down to working for myself, being solely responsible for my own income and work structure, a lot of it is just my personality. I worry what others think of me, of how my brand is portrayed and my work/life balance. I worry about the future and how stable this blogging industry is and I worry how much I should conform to the industry. Should I have a daily vlog going up on my YouTube? Should I start a Podcast? Should I post 2 or 3 photos a day to Instagram? (see, I told you, SHIT!)
Whilst most, if not all of my individual concerns will be barely registrable to many of you and will warrant an eye roll or two, for me and for many others, our internal worries and concerns are what so often leads us to this very rut. The tiniest of incidents can trigger the start of a rut – be it an argument with your partner, missing out on a promotion at work, drawing a blank on new ideas or taking a holiday and coming back to office reality. For me, it’s most of the above and it’s lead me to write this post today.
So where to now?
- IDENTIFY: You’ve read this far and perhaps you’ve acknowledged you too are ‘stuck in a rut’. Well there goes the first step to getting out of it. Identify. You’ve understood that there’s a problem and you’re on the right route to adjusting how you think, and bringing about change for the better. It’s the point I reached this week, after weeks of travelling and distracting myself from work. I’d put off chasing overdue payments, I’d swerved brainstorming new blog post ideas and I’d lost a lot of drive with my photography too. I got home and felt overwhelmed by everything.
- TALK TO SOMEONE: Be it a family member, a good friend or a partner. Whilst professional help can so often be beneficial, I always start with someone close to me who I can bounce ideas off of, with no judgement. Someone else I have found to be invaluable over the years is a lady named Emma Lucy Knowles. A lady of more talents than you can put a title to, she has long been a guiding light in my internal maze and whilst I may not see her for 6 months, she has no idea how much she has helped me self-improve over the years. Clairvoyant, healer, coach, crystal reader, psychic and author are just some of the badges on her belt, but her gifts are endless and she has helped me with everything from relationship breakdowns, to family upsets and work worries. Get in touch with her here: youremmylou.com and on Instagram @your_emmalucy.
- READ. There are so many books out there to get you on the right track, from self-help books, to more business orientated varieties. Two I currently have on the go are Mastering The Art of Quitting: Why It Matters in Life, Love, and Work by Peg Streep (buy here) and The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A Fuck by Mark Manson (link to buy here).
- SET NEW GOALS/TARGETS. No matter how small, they help. Whether it’s a meeting in the diary with your boss, brainstorming new ideas to get you where you want to be or setting in motion a new string to your bow. I’ve always wanted to ultimately launch my own product to the market after years of being a beauty journalist, followed on by 3 years of blogging all things beauty, and so the next logical step for me has always been to use all the skills, expertise and business tools I’ve been lucky enough to pick up and put them to use. Watch this space.
- EMBRACE THE POSITIVES: Because there are always positives. Cast away any feelings of arrogance you may have for blowing your own trumpet and celebrate them! Here goes mine: I left my full time job as a journalist and set up by myself. I’ve won two awards for my blog since leaving and have secured collaborations with some amazing brands. I am healthy and have a lovely roof over my head and an unbelievable family. I have a lovely community of followers and readers who lift me up with their positive comments and no matter how bad a day or week I’m having, it doesn’t compare to so many of the atrocities existing outside of my little bubble. Generally when you hit rock bottom in any area of your life, the only way is up and that’s a positive in itself.
- REMEMBER THIS QUOTE: “Everyone doesn’t need access to you. Some people are draining and they don’t even know it. You’re allowed to say no, you’re allowed to not answer calls, you’re allowed to break plans, and if you need to save yourself, do it” – Sylvester McNutt.